We can’t even know ourselves, so how can we know each other?

Even our nearest and dearest don’t know all of our preoccupations, not because we don’t want them to, but because there are too many facets to any life for all of them to be shared.

On the other hand those close to us know us in ways we don’t know ourselves.

Most of us have battled the same issues all of our lives. If people who know us well could have told us all along what we were doing wrong, would we have listened? Probably not. Would they have been right? It’s true they might have been able to analyze our faults for us, but would that have enlightened us and enabled us to correct them? More likely it would have just hurt and undermined us and damaged our relationship. They don’t know what it is in us that keeps us doing the same annoying or self-defeating things over and over, and neither do we. And we all have a sense of privacy that would like others to mind their own business. What we really want, and need, is for our loved ones to ignore the flaw and love us anyway. They don’t have to agree with us.

So how can we put up with each other’s occasional crazy-making traits and be genuinely kind and tolerant and still honest and not be walked on and not hurt the other person?

Accepting each other as we are is sometimes the hardest thing we have to do.